This Day This Place This Time

Cursing pound ennui
The relentless tedium
Boring a hole into my head
Endless and relentless and

So the bird sings
I ignore it
The bus roars
I curse it
You smile
But I frown
The coffee perks me up
The jerking fleeting
Madness of a grasping eternally persistent societal demand to conform and not to question and this drives you toward cynicism which you should flee at all costs running running running seeking the relief of belief the dope of hope the contentment of no resentment joy unbridled and love stories untitled — happens
I am the end of my days
I am the joy I seek in you
I am the love that wraps myself around you
We are the people we were meant to be
That we cannot escape
Together
I thank you for believing
And relieving
Me of the pain of living
The horrible rending of my twisted mind
As the grind grinds my bones
Or at least my hope
But I delight in us
There is always hope
Just ignore the reality
And believe in the madness
Acceptance 101

Mom

Oh damned
Oh hated
Oh benighted and sad
Your lonely travails mock sanity
Yet you rage
Angry ravings directed nowhere
I am invisible to you
Your only audience
Torment so great in your soul
Torment so awful in my heart
Why do you tear the structure of the universe
Why do you curse the precious life you have
How damaged you must be
How awful the pain that rends your being
So softly hurting
So aggressively angry
You who do this
You who scream
You who scar me
You
My mother

If Loving is Essential

Leaping flying

Cascading

Tip toeing

Exploding into darkness

Wondering why the light

Dancing with the dark

Happy just to be

If loving is essential

The reeling careening continues

And

I laugh uproariously

The race is on

See me melt

What a wondrous duo my minds are

As if there is no end

Leaping flying

Cascading

Tip toeing

Ever present in nowhere

Because of all

Kisses

Yes to loving

Which is essential

Living

Heavy sighs
Whispered cries
The longing for your happy lies
Streaming tears
Betraying fears
All the pain of my lost years
Constant pain
Life's stain
Wishing for something perhaps to gain
Always go
Never slow
Living life is all I know 

Waiting

Settling in the sadness
Leaving reason behind
On the urine scented subway platform
Knowing of no regrets
But feeling life's heaviness
The eternal questions plaguing
Wisps of sorrow taunting
Painful till the morning
When it would start again
If only the night kisses me

For Her For Me

Lateral love
I spring forward menacing
Hoping at last that you
You
You will respond
And the killer’s kiss
Will with everyday and every way
Play upon my heart strings
For you are the golden chariot ride
To eternal love
That plays upon my lips
And dances in my heart
While the wit the soul of brevity
Does claim my innocent lust
Forgive me love me be with me
You are all

The Promise of Maybes

The gentle regret of love's late afternoon
The purposeful cries of couples interlocking
The wan sunlight under crisply ironed curtains
The uncertain hopes of the desperate egoist
And all this with joy unbound and answered longings
Destiny can mean happiness and fulfillment
If
If only for the intervention of happy fate
Dance and it may embrace you
Sit and you will perish
Options
I was young once
Fun once
Dreaming once
And I enveloped myself in joyous hopeful dreams
The promise of maybes
I rocked it
It took me on twists and turns
But lo the reward
Came eventually
The searing psychic pains sometimes suffered
The senses dulled first by booze then medication
All the idle time wasted at the trivial and trite
But I have emerged a worthy man
Capable of being in this world
And proud of it and of those long ago wonderous days
Time wraps around itself