Sunday, November 26, 2017

Rainy Afternoon

Dustbin lakeside gabardine jacket
It's lovely raining
Drip drip drop drop
Water water wet wet
Nacho plebiscite aluminum siding
It's chilly in the house
Without the heater on
Sweatshirt is on cool air
Care
Flower pot Mennonite wooden bench
Clouds are thick and heavy
With precipitation
As the duck quacks
Quack quack quack
Candle wick broken kite purple mittens
Rain keep a coming
Soothing me relaxing me
Me me me meing me
Raincoat rawhide watchman's cap
This is the poem I wrote before my suicide
(Not really)

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Depressed

Oh my god this is awful the unrelenting pain the misery the living breathing thinking hell the never stop of pain an anguish it is the dark side of death’s empty abyss it is being left waiting in a dark parking lot with no one around with your stomach growling and you don’t know how it will end but it seems impossible that it will ever be this way in the eternity that stretches ahead and there is no weeping or wailing just silent suffering and nothing nothing at all gets done it is the ceaseless repetition of the trivial and inane and banal and there is no access to anywhere else so how did I write this god if I know but here it is and the pain persists

Thursday, September 28, 2017

Like the Decatur Wind

This is my masterpiece
A tour de force
I’m giving it a thumbs up
It’s brilliant
Sublime like the Decatur Wind
An awesome love of apple cheeked ghosts
More angelic in scope and dimension than
All the hope of your Aunt’s oatmeal cookies
I rise above the rest with this powerful
Statement
An instant classic
Evocative of rainy March Monday mornings
On a late August sunny April afternoon
(Because it’s time to dance)
An appeal so broad that no one will dare
Open the pickle jar
I laughed, I cried, it became a part of me
Like the forlorn football player taking a knee
Like the angry rebel throwing the tear gas back
Understated and overblown the nexus of triumph
It is like nothing I’ve ever done before
Right up there with Wolfe, Hemingway and Bugs Bunny
There is no I in team but there’s a t in it
I accept your applause and let it wash over me
I’m taking a bow

Thursday, September 7, 2017

I Am So Many and All of You Are But One

I am so many and all of you are but one
You are all surrounded
There is nothing to fear from me
I glide through the angelic forests
Pursuing the radiant love of eternity
(How nicely the moons sing to us)
You’re trapped and I don’t care
I can conquer the last and the first
There are no concerns among the vivid
Your dullness must ache as stars devour you
What chance did you have being so numerous
My solitariness was impregnable
(How gladly does the audacious mountain dream)
My virtue is swimming home
I live the triumph of a thousand dances
No pity or shame or floundering cares
All of you dejected and defeated in your multitude
(How weary the meadow springs cry out)
Watch me now watch me
I am everywhere while only here
This is my destiny
Do you understand now?

Monday, May 29, 2017

Poetry Bop Hop Don't Stop Just Tango

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
but that’s not the worst of it
add
uuuuuuuuuuu
or listen to the rhythm
and hope for the rhyme
we all go out there sometimes
ezra a pound
william a carlos william
plath the sylvia or sexton the anne
and ginsberggggg the world
I love you, myrna loy
cocktails with william powell
shed the fortune and live in the raw
but nooooooooooo crying unless
never cave in to expectations
fear the holy
but never drop the ball gown
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
there is the wonder asunder of blunder
blood and thunder
so everybody let’s dance
do the lindy hop the twist the watusi
the samba the rumba the can can
the flamingo the waltz the texas two step
the foxtrot the lambeth walk the tango
go go go go go go go go go go go go go
going going gone
dusk till dawn
but me I keep it realllllllllllllllll
that is reeeeeeal
feel?

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Life Story

I had an idea once
It was laced in pain
I had a vision once
It drove me insane

I’ve been to places
Where I left traces
Of the sorrow I brought
And the destruction I wrought

I’ve met people here and there
Some were boring some had flair
People have met me this is a fact
Some liked me some questioned my act

Words I’ve written have been read
Things that came out of my crazy head
I’ve written poems articles and fiction
They come of my imagination and internal friction

All I’ve ever written said and done
Has been for a reason or just for fun
But nothing has mattered as much as you
For you — Kathryn — my love is eternal and true

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Land of the Free -- Amerika's First 100

Plaid!

Turn that plaid off it's too damn loud

The chewing monster in the wall
will bloody well get his
and you shall hear of it

Revolution and new country
Set up as the land of the free
Constitution was writ large
Washington was first in charge
Then
Adams Jefferson
Madison Monroe
Off we go

Meanwhile there was slavery
(in the land of the free)
AND
Genocide of Native Americans
Andrew Jackson said let's have a
Trail of Tears
The slaughter of tribes went on for years

Cotton gins and cotton pickers and
overseers and auctions and whippings
The bitter blood was freedom's drippings

Glory glory abolitionists
your truth was marching on
end the peculiar institution
(but never give restitution)
Go Harriet Tubman go
Some fought for justice, you know

Lincoln elected
Succession selected
Battle Hymn of the Republic
Bull Run Antietam Vicksburg Gettysburg
Appomattox Court House

John Wilkes Booth
So uncouth
AJohnson now the boss
For the country a big loss

Reconstruction after the destruction
Compromise of 1876 was the sacrifice of the
African Americans
Meet Jim Crow everybody
Lynchings strange fruit
Talk of freedom for blacks was moot

Manifest Destiny that rich white male conceit
Resulted in colored races being beat beat beat
Land was taken
Cultures shaken

America's first 100 years
Cry when you hear
the Star Spangled Banner yet wave
Where cruelty is credited as brave

A rollicking start for the new land
Most of its leaders thought all was grand
Different opinions for people of color and the poor
But who would listen
Glisten America glisten

Turn off the noises we can't watch them reach
Stop it stop it stop 
Make it plaid and lose the buttons
Distract the chewing monster