Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Only the Lonely

Ripe and rife with hostile resentment
Bent toward sad ironies
(But not knowing them as such)
Happy to be sad
Happier still to be mad
Oh the lonely hearts who call
Desperate in the middle of the long
Seeking retribution for losses
Long ago incurred
Clamoring for justice, equality
And the soothing of their bruised egos
How they laugh
Unsure of tomorrow
Sure that it will come
And bring another chance
To cry into the sky
Of their shattered innocence
Boogie on my soulless brothers

Monday, May 30, 2011

Can’t Touch This

We can fight
We can kill
Beating each other
Is such a thrill
We can bomb
We can punch
Blowing stuff up
We like a bunch
We can hit
We can slam
We come out blazing
Bam bam bam
We are macho
We are tough
One thing we don’t like
Is taking guff
We are mean
We are strong
Whatever we do
It isn’t wrong
We will win
We’ll be number one
Might makes right
And it is fun!

Friday, May 27, 2011

Won’t Get Fooled Again

He looked like someone who was permanently befuddled
His mind in disarray, a total muddle
He couldn’t sort it or figure anything out
Never understood or knew what it was about
But he commanded respect from the easily cowed
Of the fear he inspired he was supremely proud
For he was a leader, a boss, in charge
And this man’s ego was incredibly large
He barked silly orders to and to all
And loved it when underlings would genuflect and crawl
But he accomplished nothing this terrible brute
Aside, perhaps, from accumulating loot
He stayed in power through bluff and through fear
At maintaining his position he had no peer
When finally ousted and showered with shame
He slunk off quietly looking weak looking lame
But comeback he did as memories faded
His failures and wrong doings were quietly shaded
He came back strong, this titanic buffoon
And sent the whole works again into ruin
Lessons weren’t learned people too easily fooled
And once again by an idiot they were ruled
Be wary my friends don’t get fooled twice
Figure it out when someone’s not smart or not nice
Choose wisely your leaders the first time around
And don’t let them back in after their failings are found

Thursday, May 26, 2011

The Next Frontier

You must be out of your mind
Thank you, I try to get out of it
As often as possible
Who, after all, wants to remain confined
In their own thoughts
In their own world view
With all their prejudices and opinions
How wonderful to occasionally step out 
And see what else is out there
So much to explore, you see
Why I submit to the limitations 
Of our own experiences
You can travel far and wide
If you just leave your own
Conscious reality
Out of the brain travel
The next frontier

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Film Blogging 101

Post pictures of Sandra Dee
Write about funny movies
And how funny they are
Make a list of something
Write cute quips and clever bon mots
Be witty and charming and oh so....
Let’s hear about camera angles
Be astute about Orson Welles
Insight on foreign films -- please
Wonderfully evocative words
Curt comments
Pithy perhaps
Stow your angst
Repress your regrets
Stifle the intellectual meanderings
Stuff the political suppositions
Leave the greater world alone
Save the sermons
Give us those good old standards
Something we can dance to
Know your place
And stay there please

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Just Be It

Don’t live a fear based life
Don’t run from the pain
Chase the joy
Be a pursuer of your dreams
Make them your reality
Live in love
Put the hate aside
Stash it away
In corners you never go to
Angle away from despair
Tilt towards enlightened thinking
Breath the good air
Believe in who you are
Not who they aren’t
Remember always
The better angels of your nature
Cherish them all your days
Hear the music
Not the rage
It’s not so hard
If you reject the fear
Just be it

Monday, May 23, 2011

Had My Moments

I gave my eulogy yesterday
On the long graveled road
That led to the house at the top
Of the dusty hill
I spoke eloquently about my accomplishments
Or the lack thereof
The sun felt oppressive and I worried about snakes
But I was nonetheless long winded
Telling about what a bright lad I was
Good in school
Never great
A fine athlete
Never the best
A good writer, compared to most
A fine enough husband, friend and father
Nothing to boast of really
An adequate teacher
Had my moments
Noticed as I spoke that I was quite alone
Except for the dust that hung above me like a cloud
I waved it off only for it to return
Seemed I’d never reach the house at the top of the hill
A sad looking place anyway
All by itself
I closed my eulogy with a few thoughts about what I’d meant
To humanity
Not much really
Just someone passing through
As it were
Had my moments
But any contributions would not be long noted
As I finally neared the house I realized the flaw 
I was not yet deceased
I was, however, asleep
I’d never reach that house
Instead I’d wake up
To face another day
It would soon pass too
They all do...you know
So I sigh

Friday, May 20, 2011

Odds Against

I tried
Though there was never a reason
I persisted
Though it was hopeless
I endured
Though there was no hope
I cared, I cried
Such futility
The agonies of staying at it
Through the daily disappointments
The unspeakable
Loud, hollow, long-winded words
The clamoring of the grieving
Piteous cries and angry yelps
It all made sense
But amounted to nothing
Death absorbed the joy
Lifeless forms blotting out the sun
The sufferers hiding in corners
Too long, too sad, too hopeless
And I was alone
We all were
Isolated from the vibrancy of
the spirit of
the joy of
How we struggled
Rarely complaining
The lack
The missing
The death of hope
I tried
Odds against

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The Optimist

Letters never sent and that I am just now writing
Battles I won but were never even fighting
Kind comments I accepted but never heard
Things I’d spoken without saying a word
I believed all I’d done and thought it good
I hoped you’d understand and knew you would
Troubles would vanish before they were here
Because joyous occasions are always near
The dawn brings promise of a better day
Though it is dark and gloomy and moods are gray
This is the life I’ve wanted to live
These are the promises I wanted to give
To be always sure that all would turn out right
Whether with no effort or all of my might
Places I’ve been to that I’ll visit someday
Applauded for speeches I did not say
On I go living every day to the hilt
What a lucky life I’ve somehow built

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Up Early

The woman was up at dawn
She prepared tea
Looked out the window
To the fog shrouded valley
The old house creaked
The tea kettle whistled
The woman wore a long housecoat
Her hair was braided
Her freckled face smiled briefly as she realized
There were fresh biscuits in the tin
She smelled of the sex from a few hours ago
The he slept upstairs
The memory of the coupling made her melancholy
He enjoyed it
For her it was okay
The tea and biscuit would be more pleasurable
The cat entered the kitchen and rubbed against her leg
Finally the woman sat
Sipping her tea and nibbling on the biscuit
At last a long contented smile crossed her face
The man would leave soon
The house, the day, would be hers
The fog would lift 
She’d be able to shop in the village
Work in her garden
And catch up on letters
The cat would be plenty of company
The tea was good

Monday, May 16, 2011

Unseen Enemy

Oh unseen enemy stay
Don’t enter my door
Don’t call on me tonight
Please let me be
Let me live
The life I want
Preying on my fears
Is not very nice of you
I do so struggle with the very notion
Of you sinister power
To be invisible
And always on my mind
Let go
Release me from your grip
I dread you
I dread this life
Spent in fear of you
But you are so real
If only I knew
What you do

Friday, May 13, 2011

And I Raged

And I raged
Tipping my anger over
Into your garbage dump
I seethed
With an ire tinged by bitter disappointment
For life had dealt me hard early blows
I was the wounded, owed so much
I reckoned myself special
So the world had to pay
I raged
Wanting it all
Willing to give nothing
If only
Everyone would see things my way
I could have it my way
All day
But no
So I raged
Gulping large quantities
Of blurred vision
I am an optical illusion
An allusion
To all the dreams of what I could be
Should be
If only the rage didn’t get in the way
But it did
Careening through other people’s lives
Making a mess of the simplest things
Of course
Because I knew only me
Cared only for 
Me me me me me
Raging and raving and screaming at you
And you and you and anyone
Who prevented me
From whatever I wanted that moment
That millisecond
How dare you
My God, I said
Because I thought it was my God
Not yours
Was all mine
And I raged
On and on
World without end
Until I said so

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Modern Cinema

High tech movie with a driving beat
Lots of action
So carefully edited
Quick scenes no lingering camera
Explosions and gunshots aplenty
Good looking heroes and romance
Acts of derring flights of fancy
How you appeal to so many
But aren’t you empty inside?
Do you satisfy any needs answer any questions
Entertainment by diversion
Buy lots of popcorn

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

The Grammar Dance

Predicate nominative
Dangling participle
Adverbial phrase
Oh those damn gerunds
Leave me alone, all of you
So confused
Parsing sentences
You taunt me with your complexity
Pronouns, interjections, conjunctions
Prepositions too
You are everywhere
At once clarifying and confounding
Clouding my brain
Determiners and articles
My God you never end
Direct and indirect objects
Why do we need you?
Can’t live with you and can’t live without you
Clauses, infinitives, coordinated adjectives
How I hate you
I ate you
I berate you
Need you
You are all useless clutter
Assuming I think of you at all
Simple present and perfect and future tenses
Bloody ridiculous

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Spirit Girl

How like a desperate tiger you clawed me 
Love your weapon of choice
As I in a stupor laid languid on the kitchen floor
Not able to take my eyes of a whirling dance 
That was the ceiling
But you insisted I was better
A potent man of means
Capable of greatness
What could you see
In me
What could I have done 
To deserve your
My arm swung 
Grasping for you
Or a bottle
Whatever I could grab first
You ached for me
Would deny me nothing
Especially not your body
Even there 
On the kitchen floor
Where passion erupted
Overcoming my intoxication
Making me a man
You were my enabler
I the struggling artist
Whose talent was drowning
In amber liquid
Consumed in vats
So it seemed
The cause was the cure
But you never wavered
Knowing that someday
Light would shine 
On me
My God you were right
And when I emerged
You were there
Spirit girl
Today I am still not whole
But present in the world
Surrounded by your love
The gratitude is endless
The love boundless
The life

Monday, May 9, 2011

So Much to Say

So much to write, so little time
Wasting hours, trying to rhyme
So much to say, not knowing how
Must get it written, before the final bow
Searching my mind and my soul
Trying to make my life feel whole
Wondering, guessing at verse and prose
Accumulated emptiness my greatest woes
Time escapes, can’t say where
Now that I’m older, I really care
Must keeping writing, nothing else to do
I’ll keep at it until I’m through
Searching for truth each time I write
Vanquishing the darkness, pursuing the light
Must keep writing every day
So little time and so much to say

Friday, May 6, 2011

Drag Queen Compliment

“A drag queen told me I had nice shoes”
My younger daughter said
I wonder if he’d been drinking booze
Or was otherwise out of his head
Then again she does have style
Perhaps he observed this too
Then went the extra mile
And having thought matters through
Decided to say something nice
Noting that her footwear was brand new
Not pausing or thinking twice
Paid a compliment he felt was due
I hope he’s happy in female garb
That he dons it so very proudly
I mean it, this is not a barb
In fact I’d proclaim it loudly

Thursday, May 5, 2011

There’s a Village

There’s a village
I’ve seen it in my daydreams
Nestled near the French Alps
I went to go there
It’s got cobblestone streets
Lovely little cafes
A decent bookstore
A pretty little school
And very clean nice people
It is at the end of a lush green valley
You can see the huge mountains 
A few kilometers away
There’s a creek running through the outskirts of town
You can swim in it during the Summer
I don’t know the name of the town
But it must exist
It must
I probably wouldn’t want to live in the village
But I’d love to spent a few weeks there
I’m going to look for it someday
It’ll be easy to find
Because I’ve visited it so many times
In my daydreams
Which are so often perfect
As life
And the village
Can be
If we so desire
I do

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

If I Could Write Like Isherwood

“The impotent bitchery of the slave”
A sentence about which I rave
Is a line from an Isherwood novel
The idea of a person having to grovel
It’s evocative luminous and strong
And certainly not overly long
His writings I greatly admire
There something to which I aspire
Though me I’m just a hack
The finer touch is what I lack
I plod away at the keyboard daily
Sometimes sadly occasionally gayly
I wish the results were far better
As good as Isherwood to the letter

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

The Great Exploration

Our greatest quest it to find out who we are
A life long journey into ourselves
We travel far and wide
Never minding expense
Spend enormous quantities of money
Look the wrong way
Follow the wrong tracks
Chose the wrong fork in the road
Delve into madness
Distraction by television
Make ourselves comatose
With food
Talk about nothing incessantly
Unwilling to look into any mirror
That will reflect our soul
Digging on the songs of trivia
Afraid of what we’ll find
If we find ourselves
So unwilling to embrace
Our true nature
Warned away from ourselves
By religious figures
Commentators and pundits
Feeding ourselves with pablum
Not nourishing our soul
So it gets flabby
Our spirit becomes flaccid
We droop
Propping ourselves up
With inanity
Most of us die having never known
Who the fuck we are
Sad really

Monday, May 2, 2011

The Beatle Down Dairy

I went to the Beatle Down Dairy
By myself and with Perry
Looking for cousins
I’ve got dozens
Tossing the twinkies
Flexing our pinkies
Kissing the dew
Life’s just a stew
Rock and roll mysteries evolved out of dust
Chewing life’s crust
We knew at once
That I was alone
The break in the rain
Over the glowing plain
Fulfilled our whimsy as green buckets 
And baseball ducats
Of love cake
Don’t forsake
Looked on enviously
Oh what a night