Friday, March 30, 2012

no capitals

am helpless without the written word
reading, writing
watching it unfold on the screen

the screen
where my heart unfolds to rapturous strains

there is no little conceit wrought in words of
our own choosing

the delicacy of our past perfection
those flawless memories
like cats sneaking on our bed

the rest is mere folly
so long as we subscribe to no false notions
nor pander to our own lies

about ourself

yesterday is here
tomorrow has been pushed back

so cry
you want

Thursday, March 15, 2012


What do I do with all this pain?
There's nothing and so much to write about all at once
Pain go with the writing I do and don't do

What do I do with all this love?
Never enough but always too much
Hello balance, where have you been

All my life

And there goes another sad dream
About wasted evenings
Spent looking out windows at nothing

Just never, ever, ever today

Perish the thought and the pain is still
The love too

Where does the love end
And the pain

Where does the mystery stop
And the hysteria hop?
At night when you're alone

And why do the great surging commas of my life
Create more confusion
And banish the answers of my life to --

But that's so easy
You see

Monday, March 12, 2012

Bad Bargain and Needing Rain

"Indecision and reveries are the anesthetics of constructive action." - Sylvia Plath

I ponder as I wander across the never land of the internet
Caught in the web of the world wide
Contemplating this while diverted by that and never settling down with any of it

Distract me 
Go ahead.
It's easy
I trip over my ego as I fumble away life's sweeter moments
and rage at the noise from the gardner next door
The light goes out again in my head
And I'm left in the darkness of my daily tasks
Perplexed by everyone being obvlivious of my cries for help

Deaf and dumb to the reality of....

And not ever
Not at any point -- letting go 
Because it is all too much to lose for someone who can't abide fortune's smile

I laugh too loud
Moments drift away and catch instead the hours and long days
of Earth's descent into whatever lies beneath
Finding cliches and ripping the headlines from them

I am what I said
I am what I thought
I am what I always meant myself to be
And there is little this tragedy will have to say about it in the end

Confused? Not much
But other times lounging about waiting for tomorrow 
to become yesterday and the next month to come

Where do the words come from and why do they plague me? 
Flying out of me like so much sunlight 
and drying the morning dew while I sip tea

Some words drop off never bargained for 
never borrowed never needed never mine never caressed 
and loved like that beautiful woman who is my wife

She is there now
Happiness is this very thought

We illuminate our lives with the triumphs and tragedies of others
For them we are lucky
For ourselves we are nothing 
but that which we were given by loving arms and dancing feet and a heart


So it goes and so it shall always
Provided we keep alive the quest for fulfillment and are driven by 
softer, gentler natures and not the bitter weeds of hate's conquests

We must go on

Leaves rustle
Or so --