For Her For Me

Lateral love
I spring forward menacing
Hoping at last that you
You
You will respond
And the killer’s kiss
Will with everyday and every way
Play upon my heart strings
For you are the golden chariot ride
To eternal love
That plays upon my lips
And dances in my heart
While the wit the soul of brevity
Does claim my innocent lust
Forgive me love me be with me
You are all

The Promise of Maybes

The gentle regret of love's late afternoon
The purposeful cries of couples interlocking
The wan sunlight under crisply ironed curtains
The uncertain hopes of the desperate egoist
And all this with joy unbound and answered longings
Destiny can mean happiness and fulfillment
If
If only for the intervention of happy fate
Dance and it may embrace you
Sit and you will perish
Options
I was young once
Fun once
Dreaming once
And I enveloped myself in joyous hopeful dreams
The promise of maybes
I rocked it
It took me on twists and turns
But lo the reward
Came eventually
The searing psychic pains sometimes suffered
The senses dulled first by booze then medication
All the idle time wasted at the trivial and trite
But I have emerged a worthy man
Capable of being in this world
And proud of it and of those long ago wonderous days
Time wraps around itself

Dusk in the Suburbs

Dusk
Winter
Wednesday
Cold overcast
Suburban home
Up a knoll
Bike laying in driveway
Inside lights are on
Mom cooking
One child in front of the TV
The other doing homework
Dad on his way
It is cozy in the house
It is warm in the house
There is a sadness in the house
Children sigh at the middle of a school year
There are pressures to being young and expected to do well
Too soon
Mom is bored with being a housewife with so many little things to do
All day
Everyday
Chores that bore her
The trivia of living and only fun on weekends
If then
Not like when her and husband were young
They have responsibilities now
Also known as children
She loves/resents her children and all the love they give and all the love they demand
Dad pulls into driveway curses at the bike sprawled there
He is overworked and underpaid and has to worry about bills and making his wife happy
And the children
He has to be a good role model and a loving father and tend to their needs and care
He has to care about so much now so much of it isn't him caring for others is hard
He misses college and fun and parties and booze and different girls and buddies
Oh the freedom is gone now
Mom pecks dad on the cheek it is nothing and everything
He loosens his tie as mom checks the roast in the oven
Twenty minutes until dinner is ready
Sister wants to watch one more show dad says okay but that's it
Brother is nearly done with his homework -- already!
Later he'll start to watch the basketball game with dad before nodding off
Everyone is healthy
Today
Tomorrow who knows
It starts to rain so dad calls the dog and lets it in the kitchen and the cat hisses
Dinner conversation is pleasant
Barely
They are inching along in their lives the children are content enough but the adults are dying
Very slowly
Bed time awaits
A reprieve for everyone

No Wear Man

Mystic mindless
On roads not paved
Careening towards emotional
Brake lights out
Crash inevitable
Ride still so wonderful
Complete with psychedelic kisses
And
The desperate drippings
Of loves promise
Hallelujah all the way
Swerve swerve drop and bucket
I hit the guardrail
And am tempted to revel in this fantasy
Of a long forgotten journey
To no where (know where)

The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round

I ride the bus
Bowels in a bunch
No relief
Someone yakking on cell phone
Elderly with toddlers
High school kids too loud
Driver grumpy
Backpacks swinging in the aisle
Passengers staring at their phones
Angry man in back cusses
Bus jerks driver barks
My intestines howl
Finally my stop
File off walk to subway
Will be different but same
The daily grind

I Call the Name Ecstatic

Life is the pain of my doubt
It is the agony of my awkward timing
Life is the raging anger of my weariness
I am afflicted by the twists of revolving symptoms
Masochistic tremblings of confusion
Solutions abound and perplex and confound
The vagaries of pernicious loneliness competes with trauma unrevealed
And I am taking stock of illusions unknown and destinies unsettled
I call the name ecstatic as I wonder what is to be done
Words never fail they persist and so I struggle
But happily 

Whispers

I feel that cold December morning and see its clouds
I bask in the watery clouds of a March late afternoon
I simmer in the hot August afternoon
I dance in the warm May breeze
I listen to the leaves flutter in October
And still I am melancholy
Because all these days live in my memory
Crowded and alone among the detritus of ugly thoughts
Sighs and cries and whispered beginnings vie for my time
As I wish for relief from purloined anxiety
There is nothing from nothing
But everything alive
Somewhere there is a chilly November night
Somewhere else a rainy April at noon
There is water and beer and tea and milk
And always the flow of mud
How does it happen that minds grasp so desperately
And find so much more than they bargain for?
Like snow and rain and heat and wind and
People long dead
Rough seas